“I never understood the idea that you’re supposed to mellow as you get older. Slowing down isn’t something I relate to at all. The goal is to continue in good and bad, all of it.” –Diane Keaton
Men are more shy than you think. If you have followed the suggestions in the Post: How To Write The Best Ever Online Dating Profile, you need to rewrite and tweak your profile. After he sees your great photo, he’s going to want to know about you. Your profile can be full of wonderful information, but does it get him interested, did it excite him to respond? Does it make him think: “I want to meet the gal!”
Your online profile is the biggest “investment” you have in yourself, look at this seriously. If we are going to get into this form of social meeting, whether it’s all in “fun” or for a serious relationship, we should do our best at representing ourselves.
To get the hang of it, read men’s profiles and see what they are looking for especially if you find a profile that you feel is “you”. Copy the words and use them. As you go along you will rewrite and rewrite. Don’t get overly excited and list your grandkids or family history. Keep somewhat generic, but ad specifics to wetting his appetite, but not filling him up so that he’s stuffed and doesn’t want more. Saying you “love family dinners”, tells enough. Don’t need to go into detail: “my 6 year old granddaughter, the youngest of my ten grandkids, baked chocolate chip cookies for our last family dinner; they were so delicious that not one cookie was left.” Nope! Too much information! It’s something to share once you are on a date.
Sample Female Profile*:
Open to all things intellectual, artistic, adventurous. I appreciate art, architecture and beautiful design. Thrilled about classical jazz: Bach to Botti. Love to travel with a natural curiosity about people, a passion for empty sandy beaches anywhere in the world.
Attractive, bright, playful, healthy-lifestyle, physically fit.….Accepting, sensitive, caring, spontaneous, mischievous, laugh until it hurts! An East Coast girl settled in California—teacher and director of a children’s theater. Favorite project: filmmaking with kids. A jeans to black dress kinda gal. What baggage I have can fit in the overhead bin.
Have optimistic eyes and comfortable in my own skin. I’m a sucker for a quick wit, a raucous laugh and a big brain. My kinda man makes it happen–the best of times are often unplanned and spontaneous. For the right man, my bags are packed!
My man loves what he does. Successful, physically fit and craves a healthy lifestyle. Emotionally available for a long-term relationship. Individual interests are good, but “together” is better clicking with that chemistry you can’t define in a profile.
Are you a fun, faded-blue-jean kind of guy? Active, yet can kick back, go for a run on the beach or curl up and watch a movie? Do you sing in the shower?
Photo: mine are current….and yours?
*Notice no walks on the beach in the sunset or dinning by moonlight. No mention of kids, grandkids, dead or ex-husbands. Everything is positive, upbeat and feels like this person would be fun to know. The use of the “I” word is minimal. And it’s unique! We can see the “selling” going on yet nothing is exaggerated. This is your opportunity to peek their interest.
When you edit your profile, ask yourself, is this going to attract the kind of guy I’m looking for? You have to write for your audience, not a generic profile. If you’re an avid sports person, play that up. If a travel junkie, be sure to throw some favorite spots in the profile but don’t repeat what’s in your “favorite places or thing to do. Space is limited so use it wisely.
If your profile is too genetic, it will attract no one…think: color outside the box.
Here again, I emphasize the important of a rewrite, especially after you have cruised the Internet sight for both men and women in your age range. See your competition and see what men are looking for then turn your words, the truth about you (without an over-statement) into an interesting, well formatted profile that’s edited for typos and misspellings. You have a very important item to sell, and it’s you. Take it seriously.
He’s out there and you want to draw him in.