Q. I’m too afraid to have sex with the lights on, even a candle. I’m so embarrassed about my sixty-year-old body. Should I just avoid it? LINDA
A. Do not give up on sex! And do not give up on your body either. In my novel, Excuse me…I’m Not dead Yet!, when Suzanne has sex again for the first time in some twenty years, all those personal negative body thoughts run through her mind–saggy breasts, belly fat, crinkly skin, fat thighs. It isn’t until she completely let’s go of those thoughts that she allows herself to have sex and absolutely enjoys the moment.
Holding back will not help your relationship. Allowing yourself to enjoy the moment will tell your guy he is safe with you and will allow him to enjoy the moment as well. Your insecurities will only chase him away.
If you really want to slim down, start slimming down. If your breasts sag, and don’t want a breast lift, wear a sexy bra and panties to bed and have him take them off. Believe me, he will not be turned off by your body. Keep sex fun. And remember, his body is not perfect either; I doubt if he’s concerned.
Keep the candles lit and go for it.